Courting

9-4-05

The air overhead is clouded
with questions that should be falling
from our mouths, wetting this dream
with reality.
I have not turned
but something tells me
I'm laying on a swarm
of cracks and crevices,
like a bad case of fragility
is about to envelop me,
and I would come out
as if strained
in tear drop pieces
on the other side.
...pulling the pulp
out of my beaten heart?
Folded into the middle
of your bed
I cannot tell if I am holding
the right side of you,
if I will be your angel
or your demon,
if you are a sleeping beauty
awaiting our first kiss
or a victim
I should spare.
.

One Last Kiss

6-19-97

I come to you here
to tell you my dear
that I'm off to fight in a war.
It's quite far away
and I'm sorry to say
I'm not sure what the fight is for.
But my country's in need
for more soldiers to bleed
and I am a patriot,
so I'll do my part
and fight with my heart
and hope I come out of it.
But if I don't,
and I won't say I won't,
but there's always some slim chance,
I want you to know
how I think of you so
and enjoyed all our times of romance.
Now don't you cry,
I might not die,
maybe I'll come out with a medal.
The war will be through
I'll come back to you
and we'll find some place to settle.
I leave tomorrow
but have no sorrow
for we'll put up a damn good fight,
but before I leave
on this mid-summer's eve.
I'll ask for one last kiss tonight.
One last kiss before you cry.
One last kiss to remember you by.
One last kiss before I go to die.One last kiss, then I'll say goodbye.

Jump in My Fire

8-13-98

Place yourself inside my hands
fall back into my arms

Feel the warmth of my body
where no one can do you harm

Let me sweep you off your feet
and carry you with pride

Stare deep enough into my eyes
until our souls collide

Watch the sparks fly like fireworks
into a blazing fire

You'll find my heart within the flames
for it is you that I desire

Jump in my fire
and burn with me

.

My Word II: Carved in Jello

I will never have time to do everything I want or “need” to do in one day. I know this. So instead I do “the best” I can. Which is always good enough. No matter what gets thrown my way in the course of the day. I take the lemons, the grapes and grapefruit, the oranges and I make some punchy fruit punch! But no matter what I’m given I put things in ORDER of (seeming) IMPORTANCE. I have to. I have to prioritize and keep those priorities straight. But by straight I do not mean INFLEXIBLE, cuz THAT is NOT the WAY to LIVING life. I just mean I keep them in order, but that order DOES Change, instead of being carved in stone, it’s more like it is carved in Jello. Fruity Punchy Punch Jell-o. And here’s the thing YOU need to know....you CAN have great influence over this order. All you have to do is speak. Because odds are you are on this daily list, but YOU HAVE SOME SAY over where you are on it in the course of that day. You just have to communicate. I am far too busy to check on everyone in my life everyday and make sure they are doing okay, before I get on with what I “need” to do! The squeaky wheels gets the grease, my friends, so if you're wonderin why you haven't heard from me but you haven't said nothin, now you know! Squeak Up! And please do not barely tap on my shoulder when you got somethin big or heavy weighin on you and THEN Resent me (or Life) for not comin thru and bein there! Say what you mean and mean what you say. Make yourself clear when you NEED a friend, just do it, for good news or bad news. The odds of me saying no to a heartfelt expression are incredibly slim. I know it’s not always easy to do that, to say when you could use an ear or a shoulder, even when all it entails is a phone call, BUT that doesn’t mean it isn’t the best and right thing to do for yourself. The easiest way is rarely the best way. Just speak up and make sure I HEAR you, and I’ll be there. If there’s really nothin big goin on and you just wanted to talk or hang or whatever, then say that and be understanding if I have to pass cuz of my other pressing priorities than can Weigh Me Down if I don’t handle them! Just be clear with me, I’ll always listen and I can sometimes read between the lines but....I would not want to have to rely on that in this day and age of my beautiful busy life. I do not have much time for guessing games. Hence, why I am single.

An Old Unfinished Poem about Missing Someone

.










...missing you makes me nauseous
though I truly wish it didn't
but there's something so obnoxious
about the absence of your presence
I just don't know how to stop this
Although I keep it so well hidden
for to be open and honest
has become strictly forbidden....

.

A Villager on the Planet of her Life

.
I am but a simple villager on the planet of her life

I live by the stream of her unabashed smile

The stream wanes and fills its soft banks everyday
but I am not a slave to this stream's ebb and flow

When the stream of her smile is full I feel blessed
but when it is not I do not relent
I only bend a little further to get my daily drink
before walking upstream to see
whatever may be blocking that smooth outpouring
of her lovely joy

.

...For Ice Cream

I should have found it odd,
I suppose, that driving past
a glowing Baskin-Robbins
would make me think of you.
 
But now I have to admit
I want nothing more
than to use the tip
of my tongue like a little pink
plastic spoon
as I sample
the multifarious flavors of you.
 
From Belly Button Swirl
to Neckline Divine
I will savor your
every ounce
melt you between my lips
as I explore the subtle
smoothness of your—
chocolate-caramel-coffee—
Neapolitan skin.

After much (intentional) indecisiveness,
tasting and re-tasting,
I will finally choose my favorite
and reach for your neck—
the sugar cone I cannot wait to nibble on,
which holds the sweet, round,
perfect scoop of your mouth.

I'll do everything I can
not to let one drop go
un-tasted, even lick you
from my finger tips.

And together you and I will indulge
in the childish fun of making a mess
and cleaning it up—as if our eyes
are full of hot-sticky summer days
and there isn't a rocky road
in sight.

__.